4 Ways to Lose Gracefully

This post was updated on January 7, 2019.

Posing before the interview competition at the 2015 Miss Alabama United States Pageant

Picture this: You have spent several months preparing for your pageant competition. You have even written in your journal and practiced saying your affirmations. You truly believe the crown is yours. The pageant occurs, and you give it 110%. Finally, the crowning ceremony begins, you anxiously await the results, and you are confident that the emcee will call your name as the new titleholder. Well, this does not happen, and you end up being the 2nd runner up.

Losing a pageant is never fun especially if you have put in the work, and you still do not achieve your desired results. You may feel sad or disappointed, and these are all normal reactions. However, do not stay at that mental space. Remember who you are, and know that this loss does not define you. Below are 4 ways that can help you to lose gracefully.

1. Encourage each contestant. Yes, I know you are in your feelings for not winning, but it is important to embrace each of your sister queens. Affirm them and congratulate them on a job well done.
2. Develop an attitude of gratitude. Even though you did not win the coveted crown, it is important that you are grateful for the opportunity. Not everyone has the opportunity or resources to compete in a local, state, or even a national pageant so an attitude of gratitude is key.
3. Reflect upon the experience. Pageantry is much more than physical accolades. You develop relationships and create memories with your fellow contestants that can last a lifetime. These relationships and memories would not have been possible without the pageant experience.
4. Encourage yourself. You can be your worst critic, but you must encourage yourself and acknowledge the outstanding job you did at the pageant. Even though the judges did not select you as the winner, you are still a winner. There will be more opportunities to compete for a title. Do not give up so easily especially if pageantry is your passion.

A loss is never a punishment; it is designed to teach you a lesson. Remember, who you become during the process is worth much more than any crown or sash.